Tagged: How to Get Sick
May 17, 2018 at 1:10 pm #197
I’m writing about how to feign illness or how to get sick really. I hope these tips will help you solve your problems, and you will not try to cause a real illness. I hope you will avoid these tips and never get sick.
HOW TO GET SICK AND NOT GO TO SCHOOL
Symptoms of the disease are mainly signs of how immunity fights infection. Usually, immunity is included only on the 3-4 day after infection enters the body. Therefore, if you want to get sick quickly at home, you better simulate the disease.
HOW TO GET SICK WHEN PARENTS AT HOME SO THAT THEIR MOTHER BELIEVES
- Start simulating as early as possible. The longer you simulate, the sooner you will be believed by parents
- Better start complaining about ailment (headache, abdominal pain, poor health) the day before. The ideal time is after lunch. The latest – at 18:30
- Simulate only those symptoms that you know. Have you been sick before? Recently, was one of your relatives ill? These are the symptoms and simulate
- The first sign of fever or cold is pink cheeks. Slap your palms on the cheeks or rub them
- You should look tired, sad
Stop doing what you love.
- This is a must! For example, if you refuse to play on your computer, your parents will immediately think that you are sick
- Be sure to leave at least some food on the plate. Show that you have no appetite and you will not eat even the most favorite dish
- Refuse to meet friends or walk
- Discard the TV or computer games
- Prilyagte, show that you are very tired
Start doing your homework, but do not finish. By this you will show that you really, really want to study, but you can not because of illness.
- Go to bed earlier than usual. This will strongly alert parents, and they will begin to worry
- Do not brush your teeth or get ready for bed, just go and go to bed
- It will be best if you fall asleep on the bed or at the table
- Wake up in the middle of the night. Wake up your parents and tell them that you feel unwell. Your stomach and head ache.
- Simulate vomiting, even a little. Go to the toilet and shove two fingers in the mouth, closer to the throat, to induce vomiting reflex
- Pull the lower eyelid head down strongly and hold in such a position until your eyes are filled with tears
- Do not forget to rub your face, especially your cheeks, so that they are red
- You can feign cough, but it’s dangerous. If you simulate a cough, you need to do this very, very regularly, but not too much
- Do not go to bed any more until morning. Then in the morning you will have a sick kind – bags under the eyes, a headache, sleepy, watery eyes
- Do not ask your parents to leave you at home until the last! Try to lead them to this idea. It is necessary that the parents themselves invited you to stay at home
HOW TO GET SICK IN 5 MINUTES IF PARENTS ARE AT HOME AND DO NOT GO TO SCHOOL
None of the known diseases manifests itself so quickly, in five minutes. Therefore, it is better not to feign disease, but trauma. Then Mom would rather believe and leave you at home, do not let him into school.
It is easier and easier to simulate two types of injuries:
- Sprain of the ankle
- Injury of the head
To simulate the stretching of the ankle, you need:
- Make sure that your parents do not see you.
- Imitate the fall. Remember – your leg was twisted, the foot went up and the lateral ligaments stretched out. Be sure to scream and fall to the floor.
- Remember – now your ankle’s leg hurts very much. You can not stand on it and can not walk at all.
- Every step you take must give pain.
- Show tears. Just pull the lower eyelid strongly down and hold in this position – there will be tears.
- A mild stretch generally does not have any visual signs, the leg looks healthy. Stretch of the middle degree is accompanied by redness. And only in a severe degree the leg swells. You do not need to feign a heavy degree – it is treated by an orthopedic doctor. A doctor immediately determines that you are simulating.
- You can rub your ankle constantly so that redness appears on it. But just do it so that your mother does not see. Indeed, with real stretching, the leg hurts very much, it is impossible to touch it.
- Be sure to limp very much and do not step on the “injured leg”.
- Each movement should be accompanied by a slight groan, sob or other manifestation of pain.
- Show that it really hurts you – give up some of your favorite things. For example, lie on the bed, and do not sit at the computer. This will be the strongest argument for parents.
To simulate a header, you need:
- Make sure that your parents do not see you
- Pretend you fell or hit your head in the door
- Fall or sit down on the floor
- You are now constantly dizzy and headache
- Do not forget in which place you “hit”
- Induce vomiting or nausea
- Refuse to eat
- Lie and do nothing. No computer or friends, otherwise parents will understand everything.
- Do not be afraid if you are taken to a doctor. Keep the same thing – you have a sore and dizzy head, you feel sick and really want to lie down. Most likely, the doctor will say that you have a slight concussion and you need to lie in bed for a couple of days
HOW TO GET SICK FOR A NIGHT IF THE PARENTS AT HOME
The easiest way is not to sleep all night until the morning. Then you will have the appearance of a clearly sick and sleepy person and will not have to pretend anything. Even if parents send you to school, immediately complain to the teacher about the ailment and ask a doctor / nurse. When the doctor looks at you, he will see incomprehensible symptoms and will send you home. A doctor or nurse simply does not want to take responsibility.
HOW TO FALL ILL TO GET OR GO TO HOSPITAL
The simplest and safest way to get to the hospital is to cause severe diarrhea (diarrhea). Diarrhea is a symptom of many severe infectious diseases. But remember – diarrhea should be really strong, causeless and frequent. You should tell everyone that you did not eat anything unusual, that the size of the portion was also normal, but, with no reason, you started a strong and frequent diarrhea. Do not forget to drink a lot of liquid. Otherwise, you will cause dehydration and cause serious injuries.
If despite the severe diarrhea parents send you to school, do not be afraid. There, simulating diarrhea is even easier. Ask the teacher several times in a row to the toilet. Complain of a strong malaise – you feel sick, your stomach hurts, you always want to go to the toilet. The teacher or the school doctor will not want to take responsibility and will send you home or call you an ambulance and will be sent to the hospital.
HOW TO GET SICK FOR 1 HOUR – HOW TO CAUSE DIARRHEA OR DIARRHEA:
- Eat a lot of foods rich in fiber – fruits, vegetables, greens
- Eat a lot of citrus fruits – tangerines, oranges, grapefruits
- Eat a lot of prunes
- Drink oils – olive, sunflower or linseed
- Drink or eat as much as possible fermented milk products – yogurts, kefir, ryazhenok
- Take a laxative, but do not overdo it.
HOW TO GET SICK WITH TEMPERATURE, HOW TO RAISE BODY TEMPERATURE
High fever is considered the surest symptom of the disease, so it is best to imitate it.
HOW TO GET SICK WITH A TEMPERATURE OF 38 – FORGE HIGH HEAT
Take a towel and soak it in hot water. Put the towel on your forehead for 1 minute. Then show your parents and complain about the heat. Your forehead will turn slightly red and become hot. Just do not forget to make sure that your forehead is dry, otherwise they will understand that you are deceiving.
SIMULATE THE HEAT OF THE WHOLE BODY
Under the shirt, put things on, do not let the warmth. It can be:
- Woolen clothes
- Nylon underwear
- Dense silk underwear
Lie down with it in bed under the blanket and lie down for about 30 minutes. Then you can go to your parents and complain about the heat.
HOW TO GET SICK WITH TEMPERATURE – EAT FOOD RAISING THE TEMPERATURE
The easiest way is to raise the body temperature if you drink or eat hot foods. It can be soup, tea, porridge. Also raise the temperature of all kinds of hot peppers – chili, tabasco, jalapeno. Use more hot and hot food, and your body temperature will rise.
BODY TEMPERATURE DEPENDS ON WHERE TO MEASURE IT
- The temperature in the mouth is a degree higher than the armpit
- The temperature in the rectum is two degrees higher than under the armpit
HOW TO GET SICK REALLY
Next, I write about how to get a real illness. Try to avoid everything that is listed below, in any case not get sick.
HOW TO LOSE YOUR VOICE
To lose a voice, you need to cause irritation of the vocal cords. This can be done in several ways:
- Long to scream, sing. If you do not want to be heard, you can shout into the pillow. You can quickly hoarse if you take low notes, sing bass
- Long to whisper. Whisper a few times for 20 minutes, take breaks somewhere for 5 minutes. After a few hours of such exercises, you will completely lose the voice. To whisper, you need to tighten the vocal cords, and this also leads to their tension. Just do not drink anything until you lose your voice
- To cause irritation of the vocal cords and hoarse, you can also if you gargle with something sour – orange juice, a solution of acetic acid or lemon juice. In order not to cause yourself a serious injury, pour into the glass not more than ¼ of the vinegar or lemon juice
HOW TO GET COLD, NOT QUICKLY LEAVING HOME
Cold usually called rhinitis – inflammation of the nasal mucosa. Colds are caused by microbes that already live on our mucous, so do not need to contact the patient to catch a cold.
HOW TO GET COLD FOR A WEEK:
- Dress warmly and sit in a warm room
- Do not ventilate the room, try to keep the air as dry and warm as possible
- Do not drink any beverages, including water
- Sit at home, do not go out
- Move as little as possible
- Try to keep warm and sweat as much as possible
- Go out into the cold air or take a cold shower
- Freeze well
- Lie and do nothing.
HOW QUICKLY TO GET SICK WITH ANGINA
Angina is an acute infectious disease with local inflammation on the throat. It often begins after a cold, as a complication. Treatment is long, difficult and unpleasant. Therefore, do not get sick with angina in order not to go to school.
To get a sore throat you need:
- Do not brush your teeth
- Do not treat caries on the teeth, wounds in the mouth
- Do not treat a runny nose in all its manifestations
- Closely communicate with those who are already sick with angina
HOW TO GET ARVI
ARVI is an acute respiratory viral infection. So called all diseases caused by a virus that has affected the airways. Accordingly, the only way to get sick with ARVI is to catch the virus from someone who is already sick. Sometimes a virus is transmitted to a person from an animal, so often those who work with animals, do not wash their hands and do not follow the rules of hygiene.
To become ill with ARI you need:
- It is more common to be in crowded places, especially in public transport
- Do not wash your hands and do not follow other hygiene rules
- Do not avoid close contact with sick people
- Do not wear a gauze bandage
- Less sleep and worse eating
- Most often in unventilated rooms
- Eat less vitamins
HOW TO GET PNEUMONIA
Pneumonia or pneumonia is a dangerous fatal disease. In some cases, the patient can die in just a few days, even without strong symptoms. With pneumonia, the alveoli (the small organ in the lungs through which we breathe) are filled with fluid and the person suffocates.
To develop pneumonia, you need:
- To transfer a cold or ARVI
- Do not cure colds
- Smoking as much as possible
- Do not treat chronic lung disease
HOW TO GET CHICKENPOX
Chicken pox or chicken pox is a viral disease. Therefore, the only way to get sick with chickenpox is to catch the virus from a person who is already sick. Most people have been vaccinated (vaccinated) from chicken pox. Therefore, they can not get sick, even if they will very closely contact the carriers of the virus. A person who has already had chickenpox once, gets immunity from the virus. Therefore, it is almost impossible to get sick again.
To develop chickenpox, you need:
- Do not get vaccinated
- Did not suffer from chickenpox before
- Contact with patients
- Do not follow the general rules of hygiene
HOW TO GET ANOREXIA
Anorexia is a complete lack of appetite. Most often is a mental disorder. Therefore, the easiest way to get sick with anorexia is to go insane. In other cases, loss of appetite is associated with illness or external factors.
To get anorexia you need:
- To be exposed to strong radioactive radiation
- Take drugs
- Get AIDS, tuberculosis, Crohn’s disease, hepatitis or cancer
- Do not eat products containing zinc
- Do not drink any liquid for a long time
- To consume too much vitamin D
HOW TO GET OTITIS
Otitis is a severe inflammation of the ear, usually caused by a bacterial infection. Can be accompanied by very severe pain. Treatment can be long and unpleasant.
To get otitis media you need:
- Cough, sneeze and blow a cold
- When coughing and sneezing, try to get the mucus into the ear canal. For example, tightly closing your nose and mouth
- Do not wash your hands
- Do not wash your ears
- Often scratching your ears with dirty hands
HOW TO GET SICK? WHAT YOU SHOULD NOT DO
Whatever the reason you caused your interest in the disease, remember, it is always better to feign illness rather than get sick really. In no case do not do the following:
- Do not take medicine to get sick. You can make a mistake with the dose and cause yourself a serious injury or die
- Do not injure yourself. Trauma can always be simulated without experiencing real pain
- Do not eat or drink spoiled food. Diarrhea is easier to induce, drinking a glass of sunflower oil
- Do not eat or drink anything that is not intended for this. You can cause yourself serious injuries or cause evere poisoning. Then you will regret all your life about these actions
It is better to feign illness and never really get sick.
Now you know what you should not do to be always healthy
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