Family values in modern ladies go into the background, giving way to success at work. And the conflict – family or career – takes the leading place in a hundred psychological problems of women.
Our mothers somehow did not ask such questions, what is more, important family or career? Most of them aspired to jump out quickly to get married, so as not to stay with the old girls. Quickly give birth to a child. Find a job with more or less decent earnings. And all – life was a success. Today? Today, for a twenty-year-old girl in a dress with an orange blossom and a veil, they look only sympathetically: “Fast, however, it is fast.” And most of her contemporaries do not really want to go to the registry office: at least, she tries to delay this moment of the visit. Considering that the career is better than the family: after all, in addition to being confident in tomorrow, it gives financial independence for everyone.
History is the first – no career, no family
“At the university, I was bright – why should I hide it here, I saw a lot of guys behind me, and I turned their heads to them,” Tatyana says with a note of pride in her voice. “Then a diploma, distribution, new work, attempt to stay in a team where I all the time trying to survive. He became the boss, I was in charge of two hundred people. It seems that relations with men were developing from time to time successfully. And then there was an accident. I was so upset that I had to lie about half a year on hospitals. At work, I was fired, and I realized that I have no career, no family … “
The second story – career and family in the life of a woman
“My husband and I divorced after three years of living together, leaving one with the child, wept and wept, I plunged into my work: I could say I loved it, even on the weekends I found an excuse to run to the editorial office,” the editor of one of the well-known Valentine’s newspapers – My career growth was just off scale, everyone was jealous of me, and I, swimming in the rays of success, just forgot about everything-even that I have a daughter. -No, she was always with me, but she had time for her I did not have any left. “Her grandmother took her to the zoo, a colleague from And so it was until a certain moment until I suddenly realized that I would lose my family, my child, and it was time to stop, and I needed a lot of energy to spend less time and work more with my daughter.
History the third – the family is more important than career
“I never thought about what is more important for a modern woman – a family or a career.” I just got married at the second year of the institute. “When my classmates passed exams, she lay in the hospital.” So I had to take a academy for a year. I will continue to study next year, but it was very difficult, “Alexandra describes,” my son’s teeth climb and he screams, but I have to get ready for the exams. “But he did learn, the kid went to the kindergarten, and I – to work in one small but promising firm. I was appointed deputy director in a year and promised to be transferred to the branch as a director, and then I find out that I’m pregnant! For the second time, I did not do the abortion, but I cried so much, realizing that I was losing everything that I had achieved … And now I am in the second year already on the decree, I have a clever little girl growing up, but I do not know anymore, how do I go to work, leaving her. In my head all the time spinning: “Family is more important than career …”
How to solve a dilemma: a family or career for a woman is more important
Three stories from life. Three women who have learned success ask for help from a psychologist, realizing that they themselves cannot cope. What unites them? Of course, the desire to achieve harmony in life, as well as an attempt to quench the psychological need for love, understanding, and acceptance of oneself.
But how to do that?
First of all, the woman facing the dilemma of “career or family” should understand the internal causes of the conflict, why there was a skew in one direction or another, why it was necessary to ask “What is more important than a career or a family?”. And here, of course, a specialist will help you: in one article, do not give universal advice.
Choose love and harmony!
Just open a huge secret, these concepts can not be countered, but combined! That is, one can not choose career growth or family pleasures, but live a life filled with sonorous laughter, husband’s love, successes and respect at work. Yes, yes, family and career can get along together! The truth for this is to observe several rules, the most important of which is: “Understand yourself. And if you really want to become successful in all areas, be it! “
Rules for the coexistence of a career and a family in the life of a woman:
- After the end of the working day, close the diary, forget about all the working moments and go to the family! The work will wait. Even very important.
- No reworking in the evenings and overtime: all money will not work, and a complex of guilt for relatives will be easy.
- House chores are delegated to all members of the family, from the husband to the children. Kids can well help mom load laundry in a washing machine, wipe the dust, wash vegetables for salad. And her husband is able to make purchases of products in stores.
- Weekend is dedicated only to the family: we relax together, and not from each other. Do not forget about the joint breakfasts, lunches and dinners. Joint eating is especially close, as are any other actions that you produce together.
And supplementing the list of rules for the coexistence of a career and a family in a woman’s life, I suggest not forgetting the words of the great actress Merlin Monroe: “Career is a wonderful thing. But she can not keep anyone warm on a cold night. ” Love yourself and do not try to be an ideal mom, wife, boss. It’s enough to just be a WANTED WOMAN!