We all want to be happy. So how do people become happy? To understand this question it is necessary to understand what happiness is.
We suggest you get acquainted with the myths about happiness that exist in society. Knowing them, you can find the cherished road to happiness and peace of mind.
Myth 1: Happiness is pleasure
Many of us identify happiness with pleasure. But this is not true.
We are looking for pleasure in sex, luxury meals, expensive cars, cigarettes and wine and, in the limit. But does happiness bring pleasure?
If you want to look at unhappy people, come to Hollywood: there are many who can afford any pleasures of the world. So how do you really achieve happiness?
Myth 2: Happiness is good health and only
Did you meet happy sick people? Nevertheless, here lies the second myth of happiness – the belief that if your body is healthy, then you will be happy in general. This myth of happiness, consisting in physical health, has caused a rapid flourishing of the fitness industry. People run, practice, puff – but how happy they are? Suppose, they definitely do not suffer from depression, but are they happy?
Physical health is a necessary condition for happiness. However, in itself it is not enough. For complete happiness, emotional well-being is also necessary, is not it? Have you ever met a happy person with an untreated bipolar disorder of the psyche? But even emotional well-being is not enough. Some of them “sit down” for seminars on personal development, hoping to become happier thanks to them. Obviously, happiness based on emotional well-being is another myth.
Myth 3: Happiness can be found, avoiding the inevitable grief and trouble associated with maintaining relationships with other people whose manners and lifestyle differ from ours.
However, people are not fit to live alone. We are social animals and like to be in the team. For us, the punishment is prison isolation. Indian sadhus die from civilization, live as hermits in caves, meditating all day.
Perhaps they are happy, but do you call such a life full? It turns out that we need each other, although we are different. Differences cause suffering, but, avoiding relationships, you just get out of the fire into the fire: this is the path of loneliness, restlessness and, ultimately, a sense of insolvency.
Pleasure. Health. Emotional well-being. Faithful friends. All these are necessary, but insufficient components of complete happiness. The connecting link, capable of uniting all this, is love. The more love in your life, the happier you will be. Start with the entity that is closest to you, from yourself. Do you love yourself and the people around you, things that fill your life?
Favorite people and things do not always bring pleasure. Quite the contrary.
The more love in your life, the happier you will be. Love does not mean pleasure. The difference between love and pleasure is like the difference between love and preference. We prefer for any reason. We love in spite of everything.
In reality, love for people and things does not always give pleasure. Sometimes, on the contrary, it can bring suffering. Why? Because the more pleasure they give you, the more you suffer, losing it. And it will necessarily disappear from time to time, because life consists of changes. Time goes by, everything changes, and loved things and people will not always be with you, in any case, not always when you need them, and not always the way you need them.
Love does not exist without suffering. Sometimes you will be unhappy. Therefore, love in spite of the fact that love sometimes hurts.
Myth 4: Happiness forever
The fifth myth about the nature of happiness is to expect that you will always be happy. This is impossible: there is nothing permanent. Life – “roller coaster”: then up, then down.
One day someone told me: “If you are upset about your wife, just wait two days. In two days you will feel different. “
Myth 5: Happiness is an opportunity to control
We need to realize that it’s not we who control life and the realities of life that are sometimes stronger than us. Recognition of the tiny role assigned to us in the grandiose scheme of things makes us less arrogant and more modest. And then we are not disappointed in ourselves, if our goals are unattainable.
Willing is normal, but one should not expect that the desired will come true. Counting on success, we subconsciously assure ourselves that everything is in our power. We must desire and do everything to carry out our plans, but we should not expect undoubted success. Let it be, that will be.
Look for pleasure and take care of your physical and emotional health; make friends, surround yourself with love and at the same time do not put yourself and your search for happiness in the center of the universe.